Bereaved Mother’s Day High Tea
Sunday 7th May 2023
The following extract was shared by our President during the event.
What Being a Mum Really Means
Being a mum means more than having given birth to a child.
It's loving and knowing a soul before you even see it. It's carrying and caring for a life completely dependant upon you for survival. It's giving air to the lungs that grew within you, and sight to the eyes that will never see you as anything but their mum. It's sleepless nights, its nursing scratches and scrapes, it's being stern and protective. It's teaching them to talk, to walk and to eventually run. It's bracing them for a fall, and dusting them off after the fall. It's seeing them cry and not knowing how to fix it, so instead you sit on the floor, hold them and cry with them. It's teaching them that they are smart, capable, funny and giving them the security to do great things. It's building their self-esteem, supporting their dreams and loving them unconditionally. It's letting them go, letting them fail and teaching them how to get back up. It's going without - so that they don't have to.
It's a connection that is unmatched and insurmountable in any form or in any other relationship. It's a love that grows continually. It's being terrified that you can't prevent pain, injustice, heartbreak and at times even death. It's laughing at jokes that aren't even funny. It's listening to stories that go on and on without a point. It’s songs sang out of tune and settling squabbles with siblings. It's being mean, and teaching hard lessons, that hurt you inside so deep that you want to cry, but you must stand strong with resolve. It's being strong for them when you are weak. It's smiling when you want to cry, and crying when you're smiling with pride.
It's looking through photographs and feeling your heart swell with love and happiness when you see the beauty, the happiness and life in your child's smile and eyes. It's confusion, mistakes, uncharted territory and blindfolded guessing. It's snuggling on the couch watching a movie, braiding hair till your fingers hurt, it's being woken up early on Saturday morning because they want to crawl into bed and be close to your heart. It's having the worst day and having them hug you and tell you "mum I love you", and needing nothing more.
It's a blessing, a gift, a relationship that never ends and a love that never dies.
By Jessica James. Huffpost 2015. Blog entry